Hello Friends,
today Sada-chan is a bit late but i enjoyed the the first really sunny day in this year so i set IRL higher than my world here, forgive me folks.
Anyway Sada-chan is here for you, and today she is not alone. See and smile:
Why i chose a family pic on my blog ? Simple: Those who read my postings more often know, that Sada-chan is always a reflection of my feelings and very personal.
In the last weeks my emotional world changed massive. I think it all started when i watched my friend +Matt Virgo on G+ posting a picture where he was baking some cake with his nice daughter.
I must be honest. I am a careless guy which never thought of kids or a family, until that posting.
I must really say i always was against having kids and want to enjoy life alone with my wife. I was jealous that my wife will gave a part of her love to a kid and i am not her number one anymore. Yes, thats what i think. I wanted my life the way it was for all the time. Live without much responsibility and without any problems a kid can cause.
But after seeing my friends pics of him and his daughter i changed massive. I followed every of Matt´s posting with passion, especial about the pregnancy of his wife wit the little Itashi. It make me smile every day when he told to us and waited with his family for the birth of his newborn.
I lived a part of his life when watching this new life begin. Yes Matt, your little one, your daughter and your family changed my attitude about priorities massive.
I really thought hard about what i want to do now, and i set my priority to another level. My old goal was to see Japan again, to travel around the world and have much fun. But i must say this is not longer important to me, cause i could reach this dreams and then the are short and then fade away. I wished so much to walk over Komagata-bashi bridge again, the place where the life and the time is born, but i realized that i just must close my eyes to be there instantly. I still can feel the sun from the last morning i stand on this bridge when i close my eyes, and i can feel the slight breeze then. The view of Sumida river and the mornings sounds of Tokyo. Oh how i missed that place. But i never left it for real, a part of my soul is still there, and i have a smile on my face now when i think about it.
So i can say "good bye dreams it was nice to have you" and i can do it with a smile.
I want to start the travel of my lifetime without leaving my door. I don´t want to see the place where life come from, i want to see life which grows, i want to have a family. I want to see the miracle if new life with my own eyes, i want to hear the first heartbeats of a kid on a CTG, i want to feel the first kicks of a little one when i touch the belly of my wife, and i want to see how my family grows.
Yes Denise, you not take me serious, cause i speak still like a baka in this topic, but i am deadly serious now. I want to go this step with you, the sooner the better. No doubt, no fear, no other dreams are so important than to share this precious moments. We mastered so much in our past 10 Years together, so this new journey should be very easy for us to handle. As long as we side by side we can do that with a smile on our face and with love in our hearts.
See, other people has a weird life too, and our personal situation is all other then optimal, but i am think that all which is need to do this is deep love. I have not the big money, i have not the perfect social status, and we sure live a life which is all other than normal, but i am sure we both can do this if we just believe in it.
I never asked you proper if you would marry me. I just decided this and you agreed, and this was not romantic at all, and i am very sorry about this. But now i will ask you something really important, and i do it now and here in the web.
Why i do it this way ? First is that our love grown up in this media, and second i can write better than i talk, cause here speaks my soul only.
Want you have a family with me, would you make me the most happy guy in the world and go this step with me ? Want you take the first step to the journey of my lifetime ?
I love you with all my heart, and i will support you as long as i can, you will never be alone. Love, grows day by day, so let´s our love grow a bit more <3
This was a very personal posting and i hope you all smile a bit with me now ^^
Love it is worth everything,
Shinji-kun
